Sunday
by Shinigamis Little Silencer
Summary: Wufei reflects on losing Duo


Title: Sunday 

Title: Sunday  
Author: Shinigamis Little Silencer (shinigamis_little_silencer@hotmail.com)  
Rating: PG

Pairing: 5+2 (sorta… kinda… maybe… ?)  
Disclaimer: I don't own GW and I don't own 'Gloomy Sunday' by Sarah Mclachlan. Simply borrowing them.  
Note: I think I've used up all of my creative ideas. This one doesn't flow as well as Evensong. Oh well.  
  
_Lyrics_  
  
  
Sunday  
  
  
Birds chirped endlessly in the mid-morning sunlight. Wind stirred the yellow and white blossoms of the wildflowers, silencing the music of a forgiving summer's day. Silence, in fact, blanketed the little meadow in that fraction of a second between deafening noise and screams of anguish.  
  
The explosion rocked Wufei's suit and he was forced to turn away from the vid screen because of the blinding white light. Impenetrable darkness soon followed, filling the void of the missing suit.  
  
OZ had launched a surface-to-air missile, and Duo had been centered in its path. It didn't even show up on the radar. Wufei scrambled to regain his thoughts. They were still a mile from the facility, under the impression that they had not yet been spotted.   
  
Was Duo alive? Was he close to death? ... Was he already dead?   
  
Shaking his head to clear the innumerable questions that sprang into his mind, Wufei exited his gundam and sprinted over to what was left of Duo's suit. Fresh air greeted him, the scent of a densely occupied meadow wafted on the wings of a light breeze. Wufei sighed and hurried on.  
  
He came across the Scythe first, that instrument of death wielded by one who knew it all too well. The staff was broken in half, currents of electricity leaping hither and yon. Wufei continued on through the field of strewn gundam parts.  
  
Tears clouded his vision as he searched on and on. Wufei finally came to one section of the cockpit that was still intact. Wufei studied the pilot's chair. It was tipped forward, the front buried in a mess of wires strung out from the front console.  
  
Gently Wufei pulled back the chair, tipping it back to its natural position. Wufei's knees buckled beneath him and his breath caught in his throat. Wufei closed his eyes against the sight of the horribly disfigured cadaver in the chair. That was not his companion...that was _not_ Duo.  
  
Suddenly, a whistling noise filled the air. Missiles streaked across the sky over head, raining down every once in a while on the open meadow. Heaving sobs tore from Wufei's chest as he threw himself down on the ground, lying prostrate at the foot of the scorched and disfigured chair. One of the missiles struck the meadow off to Wufei's right. The impending explosion blinded him and knocked the wind out of him...and then everything went black.  
  
Wufei sat up in bed, cold sweat dripping from his forehead, gasping for breath. At first he thought it was _all_ a dream. But then memory, unkind as she is, returned with a rush of sorrow and loss. Wufei fell back against his pillow shaking and crying.   
  
Light split the darkness of the room for a brief moment. There was a storm outside. Wufei felt a need to be out in it, to feel the torrential rains pour over him and cleanse him of every hate, every indifference...and every love.  
  
In a moment of spontaneity, Wufei threw back the covers, ran over to the window, flung it open...and jumped out of it. Wufei landed easily on the sodden ground beneath his window. The sun would have risen about half an hour ago, were it not blocked forever by angry black clouds.   
  
Wufei closed his eyes and let the rain wash over his face. The best part about rain was that no one could really tell if you were crying along with it, and so he did.  
  
_Sunday is gloomy  
My hours are slumberless  
Dearest the shadows I live with are numberless_  
  
Several hours later, Wufei sat soundlessly staring into the fire. Had he loved the man he couldn't save? The answer was yes. Oh, but it was too late to tell him. Too late to reveal how the callous and careless personality could shift into one of innocence and beauty. Wufei inched closer to the fire. Was it really too late? Could he not, one supposed, join his love in eternity as one? Absentmindedly Wufei stuck his right hand into the fire, feeling at first the warmth...and then the pain.  
  
_Little white flowers will never awaken you  
Not where the black coach of sorrow has taken you  
Angels have no thought of ever returning you  
Would they be angry if I thought of joining you?  
Gloomy Sunday  
Gloomy Sunday_  
  
Wufei quickly pulled his hand out of the fire and examined it closely. There was no longer any hair on half of his forearm, and there were open sores on his fingers and palm. He sighed and looked out of the window at the growing storm. It was already noon, yet the storm continued on.   
  
When he was younger, Wufei had felt a part of everything. The wind, the water, the earth...even the fire. But now, curled up next to this fire, he felt nothing of being a part of that storm. He didn't leave any of himself in the fire, nor gain any of himself when he was burned. Even his house seemed a distant object, that which he merely owned and maintained...but did not take pride in belonging to. He was alone. He didn't want to be alone anymore.  
  
Quietly, Wufei rose and stole to the kitchen.  
  
_Gloomy Sunday  
With shadows I spend it all  
My heart and I have decided to end it all  
Soon there'll be candles and prayers that are sad I know  
But let them not weep, let them know  
That I'm glad to go_  
  
An hour later Wufei lay huddled in a ball on his bed, holding a knife in his left hand and pressing it tentatively to his neck. He couldn't keep from sobbing, and that was his main problem. He could go forever if he stopped blubbering like a child. Forgiveness for all the unspeakable acts he had committed was not an option. Forgiveness from the one he longed to call 'lover' loomed over his head. Would Duo want him to leave the world?   
  
_Death is no dream  
And in death I'm caressing you  
With the last breath of my soul  
I'll be blessing you  
Gloomy Sunday  
Gloomy Sunday_  
  
With trembling hands and considerable ease Wufei placed the knife under his pillow. No...he would not die tonight. Not until death himself came to relieve his sorrow and suffering. Wufei cried himself to sleep...silently.  
  
_Dreaming   
I was only dreaming  
I wake and I find   
You asleep in the deep of my heart  
Dear_  
  
Wufei dreamed of finally professing his affections to the violet-eyed pilot. He dreamed that they had a world together. Peaceful slumber soon fell over the pained man, and he rested fitfully in this world of dreams.  
  
_Darling I hope that my dream never haunted you  
My heart is telling you how much I wanted you  
Gloomy Sunday  
Gloomy Sunday  
  
Gloomy....Sunday_  
  
~*Owari*~ 


End file.
